i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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