this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
