youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize