is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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