Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Of course I have a pirate flag
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
