Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
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We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
3pm strippers are depressing
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
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Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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