i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
