Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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