HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
