you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
