AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize