who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
