Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
