How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
