Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
