I think i sorta joined a cult last night
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
