I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
sick fucks of a feather flock together
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Randomize
