Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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