he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
