Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
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I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
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Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it