i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
