Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize