so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
