Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize