I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
