So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
