I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
