I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
you never un-have a 4some
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
