Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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