I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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