my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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