I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
