ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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