3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
