he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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