we have officially lost it.
"it" just moved
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
