We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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