So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize
