dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
only you would photoshop your dick
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
