Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
