Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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