Do you still have your period?
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
