My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize