What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
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