Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
My vagina is very pro this idea
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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