Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
this hospital has no fireball
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Randomize
