if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this will be a night to untag.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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