I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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