I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
