Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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