I just saw a hot homeless man
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Randomize
